Leaving way

 I posted that woman's interview. I agree with her views.

It's true though, Money doesn't make you happy...its good to have it but when you do, there is still something missing.

I remember, I ran away from home because my adopted mother was so mean to me. We have everything, she did treat me like her child but she has a favorite and I always feel I am not enough or a good child to her. I thought to myself, here I am living in this nice house. I do not get hungry unless when I starved myself because I was so upset with her, I wanted to die. I was being spiteful but really I was just hurting myself. I didn't want to live there and felt like a prisoner..obeying her every command. She actually brainwashed me. I was rebellious when she first adopted me then as I grew older. I became scared of her. I ran away thinking, I do not need to live in this house if I am so miserable. So , I left everything behind.

I remember the rush of dopamine, of being "free" again.

Why would a child or teenager feel like that if they felt loved and happy? 

Then we had our big house in Ohio...we've been trying to manifest it and it happened. I was proud that we had finally achieved it in the beginning...but then he started working hard and coming home late and tired. He had hardly any time  with me and the kids..then I didn't really like that. It was better when we were living in a small condo and everyone is nearby (instead of the big bedrooms upstairs) and we're all together. 

I do not know why these things has to happen. maybe it was a lesson in life.

Now, Im here in Paris in a little "box" of a room as my friend would describe it and I feel okey for now to live in it. It is just a tentative move. I just want to experience Paris and I am grateful for the my friend Josie letting me stay with her.