Walk with me this way..

To be honest I like the Japanese laundromat I went to back in Tokyo my view from inside the Lavarie..   It was hard waking up this morning.. my roommate didn’t leave early for work since it’s saturday today. I’m so used to her being not there since Aug.. the room felt small again.. Whenever she comes home at night , I just stay up in my bunk so she  can have the whole floor. I don’t know I guess I’m so used to having my own space.. for all these years. but it had only been a month since we’re together in this tiny room.since she wasn’t here much in Aug. I guess that’s life everywhere.. you only go to your place before and after work.  So it’s laundry day again .. I wonder how many more laundry days I have before I’m not here in 16ar anymore.  Told her that this Sept will tell if i’m going to really stay here in Paris or not. I leave it all in God’s hands and she understood.

  I opened youtube and instantly typed.."What is your purpose in life? Here I go again.. I've been feeling lost lately..it is nice not to be working..ha ha..but then I need money to function..lol    I was thinking, maybe God just wants me to rest right now..I've been working like a dog these past few years...I liked working though, it's a good distraction from my worry wart mind. Plus I like to think I am helping when I am working. Like when I was doing Events , I was helping with preparing the banquet and learning a different skill at the same time.  I think if I had pursued my original plan as a "theraphist" or psychologist..I would have a "career"..I've been meaning to be a nurse, but somehow one way or the other it gets hindered.  So now, I'm a jane of all trades. I'm mostly a photographer though  because that is my passion. I like to take other people's memories for them thru photographs.  Now, I'm here in Europe..I am not a...

  I just realized.. it’s hard to trust someone who’s popular in the internet? lol I’ve been trying not to share my profile photos openly to my facebook friends and family.. because sometimes there are guys who openly flirts… I really do not like that whether they’re  cute or not. So I would look at a guy’s profile and there are a lot of women flirting with him too..lol But like i said .. its just a photo.. But can’t you help thinking if they’re flirting back? Won’t they think the same way with me when they see mine? lol I was just wondering..

    I should be called “ Master or Queen Patience “.. lol All my life , i remember all i do is wait patiently.. When I was abandoned as a child, I remember this one woman who cared enough to watch over me when she’s not working..but whenever she is at night and she didn’t finish yet..I remembered sitting in that corner waiting for her to get done.  Then when i’m supposed to be having fun in the province.. I remember an idyllic day.. sitting on a rocking chair at around 4 or 5 years old.. waiting .. I remembered thinking..” when my life starts.. why am I here again?”.. I know sounds really weird coming from a 4 or 5 years old kid. Then when I had my first job in NY as a cashier .. when we’re not busy.. i stand there and wait for customers to pay. Now, i’m here in Paris.. waiting for September hoping I get a job. I could not just apply since I don’t have a french visa.  Maybe, Life really is a “ waiting” game…even waiting until you die of old age. But I do not believe ...

  I’ve made a video for my Monaco trip.. i’ll post photos laterz

  No, I don't have a multiple personality...lol  I was just thinking there are so many facets a human being is. He/She is just not one person or character.  I for one has many sides of me. That's why I have that Album in my Facebook titled , "Many faces of me"... I am lucky that I can take pictures of my different selves.  I have the photographer look with my camera, the sexy one, the cutesy one, I even have a funny one. It's funny though, I really don't like taking full body shots whether I lost weight or gained weight. oh yeah, I have an expressive face I guess..I like making faces..lol I don,t know I think I had my mommy faces when my kids were growing up...Honestly, I didn't pay much attention to myself when they were growing up. I did however try not to gain too much weight, I think I was a fanatic ..I even incorporate it with my cleaning at home..lol I look at all these different photos I took and somehow I enjoy them but don't really like to sha...

So many hours i’m watching.. LA, USA ..Josh  San Francisco, USA… Mae, Char & Abby Austin, Tx USA..Alyssa & Will Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.. Margo  Miami.. where my friends and followers are Sometimes looking at these times.. made me wonder..its true.. everything is happening all at the same time ( zones) i almost forgot Boston.. but J can manage.. lol

  As she sat there by the Eiffel Tower..across on the other side by the seine river. She thought to herself, "You’re just here only for two months ,are you giving up Angel?" For one month I was out of job because there's no work in Aug..most families go outside of Paris. Again I thought, "what is here for me?" I do not want to be negative..I know I had been praying and asking my guardian angels to help me for I felt helpless and going to be homeless.. The woman I'm rooming with has a complicated relationship with her adopted daughter who is coming back outside Paris and she doesn't want her back,,but she doesn't want me in the room with her either. I was prepared to live temporarily in that room..I was thinking I am just starting over, this is just a stepping stone. well..my first room.  I wonder how the other people survived here. Well, I remember I survived in New York all by myself for 5 years. I had a job then and my boss actually liked me becaus...

 I was looking forward to see Menton., and when I saw it.. it was exactly as I thought it would be..

I  miss my Dongie... I could hear his voice telling me..."come home Angel",,, But there's no more home (he was my home for 29 years)..I am alone now..I do not have a place to call my own. I though I'd stay in this place indefinitely but...it feels like "doomsday". The only person that ever loved me...well besides my dad is my Dongie.  He was the only one there with me thru thick and thin ,,,thru all my adventures and misshaps in life..for 29 years..why did he has to go? where should I go now.. As I look back I do have a lot of guts coming here in Paris. Maybe because this is a good distraction from being in Florida seeing his memories everywhere. (crying now..ugh)  Maybe I should just go home..but where is home?? Mae and Char are staying with her parents..I wish I could finance the place we're going to move in..but we need jobs first in order to move to a place. It's true though...never trust anybody ...people always has an agenda..they need you for ...

  Sometimes I wonder if I do have people reading my Blogs...or maybe I'm the only one who reads these..regardless...it's ok..I'm just documenting here my life.....my short life..lol This is a good outlet unless the internet dies..lol I maybe am not making these blogs readable or relatable.. I don't care..this is my life.. If they follow then they follow..if not.. I've so many social media..but I think my favorite is Quora because I could actually help people there when they ask a question. I do get a comment back that I did helped their dilemma on certain subjects..mostly love/ relationships . It makes me feel good I could help them in some way. I do the same way, I read a lot of different perspectives on line and learn from them. So, if I stopped my blogs altogether maybe Ive abandoned this. Life is short...time to move on to other things instead.

  I think my journey here is ending . Whatever it is God , I give my troubles to you.. I miss the beach..where I can contemplate, meditate.. but Florida is not my home anymore.. hopefully I find a new "sanctuary" here...hopefully

 I do not mean to be negative.. I try to be positive to attract good Karma. I vow from now on to just post good stuffs and try not to post anything indifferent and nega.. i’m sorry.. i’ll try to be good.. lol

 I’m glad i’m a bit consistent in this blogging thing.. lol.. I’d usually forget or when i get too busy i’d abandon it.. lol So we arrived this morning from South of France at 6 am. I’m glad the bus AC wasn’t acting up or got turned off.. but really.. I was too exhausted to noticed.

 So many places in a weekend.. Cannes, Nice and Menton.. didn’t see much of Nice..

Just glad we got to our location safely.. Went to take a train to Menton as soon as we got to Nice..so I didnt see much of Nice. I love menton because it looks cool there..well if you like old world. So many people on the beach , reminded me of Ft Lauderdale beaches or Miami beaches. I didn't like Cannes as much though..nothing there except a beach..but if I have a good paying job there I might stay..lol  took some photos with Myra...my something off friend.. She was the one I admired..she said she lives here by herself and all her family is in Canada. She had survived for 3 or 4 years ...well maybe if she could I could too...i meant survive alone.  I know I have made some friends here already... maybe I'll have more friends later..

 I’m on the bus to Cannes tonight.. i woke up and it’s 12:30 am I’m excited to see Menton instead of Nice or Cannes or Monaco . Spock was cool today.. he’s going back to Paris and I’m leaving Paris.. lol anyway.. hope it’s worth the trip.

i think this is funny.. the photo looked like he’s throwing the ball to the guy in the train.. caught/shot this photo..lol  I’m looking forward for the trip tommorrow.. i have been all over my social media today.. posted the Sacre Coure video in my FB and tiktok .. am a bit disappointed today but maybe i’m overthinking.. by Tuesday everything will be clearer.. im listening to Margo’s voice in my head right now.. lol Anyway.. its a great day today.. Thank you Lord for the blessings..

 I went to Montmarte this morning.. i thought I’d explore the bottom part.. i’ve been to the Sacre Coure 3 times plus there’s always a crowd up there. I love discovering new places.. I thought I remember I’ve been in a parallel store when i was in college back home. I was really into cute stationeries and stuffs.. After school I think I wandered around somewhere in the vicinity of manila.. i don’t remember where but I remembered I went into this cool looking store with lots of cool cute stuffs. I think they were closing.. I bought some stuffs but i didn’t have enough so i planned to go back. a week later.. I couldn’t find the store.. not even the closed sign or something.. Then while I was walking around Montmarte that store reminded me of the stores here.. weird.. I truly needed to get outside since i was cooped up for two days.. Ot was a great weather. perfect for walking around.. I realized next time I need to dress appropriately.. no more leggings.. lol.. but in my mind.. i wan...

one of my door collection photos  I just realized, I've never been alone for 4 weeks in 35 years. I was always around people. I had roommates when i was single, then when I got married I had my family. This month, was a revelation. I could be alone. I was alone anyway for 4 years well not with parents or siblings but thru the kindness of other people. I would wake up in the morning and try to plan what I wanted to do. I survived for 4 weeks..alone.. I wasn't lonely like I said because I am still full of amazement with this place. If I have more money I would be traveling everywhere but I need a job to sustain that hobby. Funny I just started to get to know other people..but I'm back to square one. I am loyal person and talking to Spock for now is enough. I don't know..it feels that he's kinda strange...but if he's playing games then , I'm moving on. How strange to be mature...you don't have any patience for games anymore. Ate Josie didn't arrive yet....

  It was laundry day today..I just like having clean clothes and not a lot of laundry so I try to go every week by Rue Lauriston lavare. I go and put my clothes in the machine then I walk to Auchan stores to get my groceries. Tommorrow I want to go by that roasted chicken place where Ate Josie told me to get before. I went by the filipino store and she was offering me "pancit"..im like I'll turn into pancit because that's all I ever eat here..hahahah..I go to Paris to eat filipino food..lol.. Spock ordered a french food the other day and it was just like grilled ham and cheese..it was ok I guess, I ordered French burger , well since im in france so it's a french burger..lol I also was busy fixing ate josie's bed..I wanted it to be more stable..I wonder if she would noticed it. lol I made my bed stable too..hopefully it works. Now I need to throw some extra stuffs out..i'll wait till dark so nobody can see me..lol...there's a location for bulk items,,im...

The Cyclops and the lovers  Medici Fountain in Jardin de Luxembourg  Its been a lazy sunday.. but i did some editing this morning.. I wish ive brought my Canon the other day but my iphone14 does take great photos. i heard from Spock he said he's busy with family.. i hope he has lots of fun.. most Parisians are in south of france i guess.  I wanted to go to Menton..  A lot of the tour buses are going to the beach.. how ironic… i just came from the beach and i admit, Florida’s beaches are more beautiful than any beaches I see here.. i meant the photos..i wonder where here in Europe they have great beaches.. St Tropez? Anyway.. i think i caught a cold from leaving the windows open last night.. the weather went down last night and today.  one more day tommorrow amd ate josie will be here. Margo is so sweet.. she's like my cheerleader.. and she's in Malaysia all by herself.. what a strong, independent girl..

Wowwwww..how time flies! 3 more days and Ate Josie will be here. And my bike is gone.. this room is back to normal except I cleaned a bit. How funny, I wish I was getting paid doing these blogs..but it's my own personal journal, adventures and memories..for now of living in Paris.. I wonder how  long will I last here..lol I am back to my singleness..ha ha ha...it was fun..the idea of Spock..but I have this nagging feeling..I've nothing to offer nobody..but that's just my pessimist, demented ideas swirling around my self esteem. lol I do have lots to offer others..they should know me first..but I think my journey is by myself right now...I can live with that. I'm not in a hurry.  Life should be lived with gusto. Meanwhile, maybe this being alone is a blessing..it will always be, that little voice inside me talking..everyday you wake up is a blessing. I live in an exciting city..take advantage of the History and lots of things to learn. There's this old photogapher in...

 Wow…… So Spock is gone🤣😆.. wth oh well.. as the french says “ c’est la vie’ I hope Spock lives long and prosper.. lol

  I totally forgot to write here last night...lol but it's just a day so I think it will be ok. Yesterday Aug15..was an Awesome day.. I met Spock..ha ha ha..how cool is that? had fun walking around Paris..Jardin de Luxembourg..damn .. I can actually hear myself speaking in a french accent in my head as I said.. de Luxembourg..lol then went by Notre Dame...saw the oldest tree in all of Paris..why? i dont know why..lol then walked along the river Seine..for the first time along it's banks..and we got lost...lol how tiring but funny.. it was interesting though, saw groups of latin people maybe three different ones..listening and dancing to Latin music ...reminded me of Bayside, except we have a big stage by bayside..or the restaurants by Hollywood beach boardwalk at night..super loud music with dancing.. It was great to see them all converging there instead of French people. I told Spock, I waited 6 years to find him or him finding me..lol...Let's just wait and see....he's...

  I hope itbwill be great tommorrow.. I walked for 2 hrs tonight bec i didnt walk when its hot outside. I wanred to see the Eiffel but i was hoping not too many people but it still are a lot of people. Actually.. i need to be positive thinking.. God is good , God is great..

  Saw Myra after 2 years.. she gained weight must be bec she was cooking for her clients a lot. It was like we havent missed each other and just saw each other last week. Shes cool i think. i treated her out 2 years ago for dinner  then she treated me out for dinner today. How fun it is to talk to P.  so much laughing.. i hope he doesnt change…  Ate josie might have a job recommendation for me in september.. I hope i get the job.. hopefully..  Then tommorrow is the last day to know if i could go to Italy with Ate Lorna’s tour.. cross fingers.. although P said Venice doesnt smell good in the summer.. Last time I went to Venice was September thays why i didnt smell anything.. lol.. fingers cross.. I didnt know he liked star trek yet ..soo no Spock yet..lol I miss Abby

 6 mins before 12 am🤣 Had a great dinner with Ate Lorna, Margo and Michelle tonight. Margo is going on a trip to Asia for almost 2 months, Ill pray that she be safe.. Okey im having fun talking to new people.. taking things not seriously.. just getting to know more people here in Paris.  I I feel that I want to cut my hair this short again miss my Ate Josie though..

 I totally thought i posted here last night., felt weird.. It had been a long day.. went to meet someone who suggested we see a Matisse exhibit in Fondation Louis Vuitton.. I wasnt impressed. lol It was good to know someone to can converse French with or at least taught me how to pronounce it the right away.. alas.. its short lived.. I guess you can't win em' all.. I want someone who will take all of me.. warts, habits and all..

 How interesting .. Tommorrow..god hope it’s ok.. I went to Boulange Billan corte where i stayed with Ate Lorna.. I remember it the way it was from 2 years ago.. Got some nice tshirts,, It was really super chaotic by Trocadéro this morning.. i don’t like it at all.. too many people.. more than the people in NY city.. anyway,. im glad the Olympics is ending tomorrow..

So I finally got to take my bike out today..I'm not used to it's handle bar..it's very unstable..of course because it folds its secured by a thing..lol I forgot this city has a lot of up and down hilly kinda streets..it's not flat like Pembroke pines..It's easier to walk when going up hill than trying to bike it even if my bike has 7 speeds..I just don't understand why I'm having problem with the brakes.  How funny, by the time Ate Josie arrives..the whole room would be spic and span..lol No jobs lined up yet..Parisians are all on vacation so no regular jobs until Sept. I just need to find a job God please help because I used some of my money in buying for my Photography business. Hopefully I'll find new clients here in Paris. I think no one bothers to read these blogs that I'm writing..lol...It's ok I'll just make it my personal diary/blogs. I'm also glad that Olympics is finally over on the 11th..that means back to regular streets..no m...

 I did go this morning to watch the Open Water Swimming Olympics for women. I was there an hour early so I have a spot...but me being a photographer can't stay in one area since I want different angles.  I'm actually tired..I finally finished rearranging this room..ugh.. I'll try to write more tommorrow..